Trying to say buh-bye to the bah-bah

Right after getting back from the farm and closing in on Taylor’s 17-month birthday, I finally made the decision to start weaning T off the bottle. And for those of you rolling your eyes in that my almost year-and-a-half old child STILL takes a bottle, know that the snuggle-time this Momma gets right after a bottle is absolutely priceless. BEST SNUGGLES IN THE WORLD. Why on Earth would anyone want to give that up? Especially when time spent not cuddling is going to be spent dealing with class-A nuclear melt-downs because there is a sippy cup in place of her thrice-daily bottle.

And because I’m a cuddle-junkie, I decided to just knock off one bottle at a time, starting with her after-nap bottle. And on that first day, while she was stretching off her nap, she took one look at that sippy cup filled with milk and gave me a face that would only compare to the reaction my husband would have if someone decided to canceled the Super Bowl. Frantic, confused and just NOT HAPPY. So not happy to the point that she actually slapped the sippy cup out of my hand, wriggled off my lap and threw her crying-self on the floor. And only because Chris was right there, cheering on the sippy cup the whole time, did I not fly into the kitchen and make her a bottle. Because, as a mother or father, watching your kid cry because of something you did is about the worse thing in the whole world. Which is another reason this parenting thing is the HARDEST JOB EVER.

And not only did I replace the bottle with the sippy cup, but it was a NEW cup. A completely different style of sippy cup. For the last almost-year, all juice or water she has drank had come from a straw-cup, not a regular tip-up cup. Which, now I know, is a horrible idea for a beginners cup, as Taylor learned to NOT raise up her arms when she wanted a swig from her sippy cup. Just sit and suck. Which made my daughter a super lazy drinker.

So, on the third day’s encounter with the after-nap not-bottle, she FINALLY grabs the tip-up sippy cup and tries to SUCK out the milk, holding it like she would if it had a straw. And when no milk got in her mouth, she was NOT HAPPY. And after a two minute long canceled-Super Bowl face, I grabbed the cup and tilted it up for her. And she let me feed her for a few minutes, and then I stopped because that was about the same thing as just feeding her a bottle. Only without snuggles. So I wasn’t going to do it. It was all or nothing.

I would wrap her hands around the cup and help her lift it, but the moment I let go she would let it drop to the ground, stare me down and start crying. Such a little manipulator. I mean, if the girl’s smart enough to repeatedly clasp an airplane seatbelt, can throw a basketball across the room AND figure out how to open the bathroom drawer safety-locks, then I think she’s bright enough to figure out how to hold her own sippy cup. She was totally taking advantage of me. Who do I look like? GRANDMA? No, ma’am. Momma’s not backing down on this one, Sweetheart. There’s a new sheriff in town.

So this tug-of-war has been going on for a few weeks now, and it hasn’t been pretty. And on a side-note, the weather has been cooling down so we’ve had the windows open all day. Meaning the neighbors are probably scratching their heads as to why, when three o’clock rolls around, the Amys house sounds like a torture chamber. Two days ago it was so bad that I finally threw a giant blanket on the floor in order to protect her head as she flailed about the living room. It was THAT ridiculous. And I know that this is the Universe’s way of getting back to me for as easy she switched from breast to bottle. She couldn’t have cared less at the time, all she wanted was to be fed. She didn’t skip a beat then, and now she won’t even LIFT HER ARMS.

And just about when I ready to crack, give her a bottle and vow to home-school her for the rest of her life, this afternoon we turned a corner. Did she cry when she saw the sippy cup - Yes. It lasted all of four minutes, which was how long it took me to turn on Dora and get her fruit snacks. And then I sat down, asked her how her snack was. Good, she says with a nod. Which sounds more like Gut, but whatever. And then I asked if this was a good episode of Dora, and she nodded, Yep. And then I asked her to take a drink of her milk. And she looked down, grabbed her cup and TOOK A DRINK.

And it was one of the proudest moments of my life.